TBS Learns To Love

Make sure you get what you deserve with our relationship contract

It’s an oft-repeated romantic tale. Two parties enter a relationship, and it is not what it promised to be. So, why not have some legal protection?



In the darker corner of relationship circles, there’s an idea that seems excessive at first, but makes more sense the more you think about it. Should we enter our relationships with contracts? Don’t get me wrong, love is all and all, having someone mind your sharper flaws will forever remain beautiful, but what happens when it doesn’t go exactly to plan?

What follows, is the familiar contours of your same old arguments. Now, as we all know, the relationship argument is an important part of the relationship. Consider it the aggressive bargaining in order to enable growth of the partnership. If we’re being honest, it’s dangerously close to arguments in business, except with more thrown crockery, hurled insults, and slightly more business of another kind.

The problem, of course, is when the same old issues reemerge unresolved. As we know, Issue a soon manifests itself in Issues b through x all the way to y are we together. So, it behooves one to make yourselves forever clear, and address problems adequately the first time they surface. This would make complete sense, if we were all better people, but we aren’t. We say things we don’t mean and forget the things we promised we’d do.


The relationship argument is a shipwrecked door in the middle of the Atlantic. There’s room for one, and the person found to be wrong is sentenced to sleep on the ocean floor. What is seldom addressed is what placed them both in the situation in the first place, the iceberg across the hull. This is where the relationship contract comes in. Yes, it sounds American at best, and a pre-relationship prenup at worst, a preemptive destruction of the trust you’re supposed to have. Where’s the trust? Why are you doing this? Don’t you just love me for me? Yes, I do love you for you now, but maybe not who you are later.

Consider it this way. Everyone knows someone who is in a bad relationship, where everyone else agrees that one party is ruining the other. Is she really going out with him?, as the song queries. While the relationship wasn’t unsuitable in the beginning, one party is now not giving the other what they need, wanted, or assumed they were going to get.

All the contract is, is something on paper. Something independent of the he said/she said/I didn’t say that babe, you did/When did I say that? maelstrom that love fundamentally becomes. Consider it an out when it’s not working out. Rainy day insurance when the tears cascade, making the footing unstable.

You deserve that much, right?

If your head nodded even slightly at the above, and gurl/bruh, frankly it should have, please feel free to use the following as a sample next time you hook up with someone who shares the same faults as your ex.



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