Mark Thompson

Company creates robo-stripper with working AI, because reasons

robo

The darkest neon corners of your suburb might soon be populated by AI controlled robo-strippers. Why? Because progress, that’s why.

 

 

There’s something that we need to accept. One day we’ll be paying robots for sex. However, that day may be just beyond the other side of summer, as one company has announced a robo-stripper, replete with a functioning AI. Fair warning, I suggest you wash your hands thoroughly after you read this article, but a sex cam company has twerked against Asimov’s Three Laws of Robotics, grinding this terrible mind baby into conception.

CamSoda executive Daryn Parker says Cardi-Bot (although “not named or inspired after the rapper, Cardi B) will be “conversational” in early 2019, thanks to a natural language software that is under development.

While Cardi Bot’s head looks an awful lot like a closed-circuit security camera, it sports other features we might like, pairing human-shaped features with nifty high heels. Sculptor Giles Walker is the man originally responsible, designing the robot as part of a series he calls “Kinetics

 

 

CamSoda is merely cranking up the sex, adding the ability to communicate with punters. Blergh. When the five motors that allow it to move around a pole are engaged, it will be doing it because someone stuffed enough money in its robo-garter.

Lord, you can just picture it. Welcome to the stage, 011100011101111. 

Why yes, I happen to have the same question as you. A company rep responded to the shrugged shoulders levelled by Inverse, stating: “I can assure you, this is 100% legitimate.”

CamSoda says that Cardi-Bot will perform weekly shows for free to the public, where viewers can “can take Cardi-Bot into a private cam session, during which they will be able to interact with her more intimately, where she will perform tasks that are activated by tips.”

And yes, I know the link, and no, I’m not posting it. I don’t want to kink shame anyone here, nor do I want to be a specist, but if this is cooking your CPU, your motherboard didn’t connect with you enough.

 

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